RED STATE

I can answer that question in one word. It's about damn time! Those sad people really piss me off with their 'woe is me' and 'won't you talk to me and tell me I'm not worthless?' attitudes. Well, I can't talk to them, because I've got stuff to do, like working in order to keep this economy going. So send them to Mars!

But, are there are too many sad shits to be able to send them all? I think we need some guidelines. And since you didn't provide any, allow me.

First, we should only send sad Christians, not Catholics but Christians. And we must do this, just in case they encounter other beings. We do not want to send the wrong message (i.e. Catholicism, Judaism, Islam, Scientology etc..) to the rest of the solar system or universe.

Second, we should send only women, sad young single Christian women. But with those women, we should send a role model. Someone older, someone who's been through the tough stuff in life and come out the other side stronger and wiser. For this role, I will volunteer.

You'll be surprised what I'll be able to accomplish, when left alone with 10 to 15 women for a couple years. Don't you worry God, America and planet Earth, I will make you proud.

BLUE STATE

Are you talking about the candy bar or planet? Because a Mars bar would hit the spot about now....You're talking about the planet, fine. And you want to send sad people there.

Well, even though I don't like to look at or talk to sad people, that doesn't mean that we should send them to another planet. That's not going to fix anything....But it would nice to be able take my son Freedom to school without seeing that same old lady moping at the Starlight Diner. That broken down bag of bones makes me want to drink. But, I have to support her right to be upset over her probably wasted life. So I can't advocate sending her into space.....or can I?

What if the trip to Mars was a form of treatment? Maybe sending these sad sacks into space would help them. It could give them a purpose, a chance to contribute to society again or for the very first time. I bet the long trip would build their self-esteem and by the time they landed on Mars, they would be the perfect representatives of the United States and the human race.

I don't think the founding fathers would have wanted us to turn our backs on the sad. So let's raise the taxes on the wealthy, (get Rob Reiner to write the bill) and send those melancholy monsters to Mars....Geez, I wish I was a little sad myself.